Love in Tunisia

Bezness Tunizija Stran 1          Stran 2
 
B E Z N E S S     T U N I Z I J A
Native English Original Text Slovenski Besedilo (strojno prevajanje)
Bezness Relations

There are some relationships in which the beness background is almost always existing:
  • Relationships with elderly women
    Even though the founder of Islamic religion gives a positive example, which will always be pointed out, the actual number of marriages between younger men and older women is extremely low. An elderly woman offers little social acceptance, especially if she cannot become children anymore.
    The financial aspect plays the major role here, because an older European woman usually owns a property and/or got a secure job, and thus constitutes at least for the time needed to obtain the residence permit a desirable choice.
    While not rarely even very young women marry old men, marriages between a man and a woman who is more than 2 years older than him are extremely rare and practically happen only with women from western countries.
  • Relations with large women
    Even when Tunisian men like to say that they like that the money they "invest" into their women shall show up on her, there is a big difference between "chubby" and "obese" - obese women are in Tunisia, as well as in Europe, a target for bad and asteless jokes and social acceptance is rather low.
    However, such women are an easy "victim", because they often have a low self-confidence and are touched particularly, when an attractive man pretends to show interest in her.

  • Relationships with divorced women
    Just as with older women, positive examples from the Islamic religion are often pointed out, but in reality, the actual interest to marry a divorced woman is very low and usually only found in the combination of a quite old man with a divorced young woman.
    In addition, such a relationship can be burdened by the children of another man, because the acceptance of children of another man is, with Tunisian men, very low, to say the least.
    This results even in domestic marriages usually to the case that, when a woman remarries, she will more or less abandon her children and leave them either with their father or elsewhere in the family of the woman or the man where they will then be raised.
    Divorced women are, as well, often seen as an easy victim, because a clever Beznesser will quickly gain an emotional access to a single mother who wishes on one hand again to have a complete family and on the other hand being longed for by a man.
All three groups mentioned above are preferred 'Bezness" targets, and members of these groups should keep their eyes particualrly "wide open".

Family visits

Many European women mistake an invitation to the family of a Tunisian man and being there introduced as "the future wife" as an act of seriousness - but it is not.

In most cases, women visits to the family take place regularly, the family is privy - and there are even cases in which the Tunisian wife will be presented as a "sister" or "cousin" of the inviting man.

While it is true that a Tunisian man introduces his future wife to his family, in the tourism experienced families, almost all Europeans are "introduced" in the hope of obtaining "donations" and gifts - therefore, a formal introduction to a man's family is definitely not a sign of seriousness in terms of a future marriage!

In many regions of Tunisia is an habit that the future bride will receive a gift from the famliy of the husband, eg. a silver or golden bracelet.

Conversely, a Tunisian woman will NOT introduce her future husband to the family, but the man instead will visit the family on his own and introduces himself and his desire to marry the woman.
Bezness Relations

Obstajajo nekatera razmerja, v katerem beness ozadju je skoraj vedno obstojece:
  • Odnosi s starejšimi ženskami
    Ceprav Ustanovitelj islamske vere daje pozitiven zgled, ki bo vedno treba poudariti, dejansko število zakonskih zvez med mlajšimi moškimi in starejše ženske, je izredno nizko. Starejše ženske, ponuja le malo družbene sprejemljivosti, še posebej, ce ona ne more postati otroci anymore.
    Financni vidik igra pomembno vlogo, saj je starejša ženska ponavadi v lasti Evropske lastnine in / ali dobil varno delo, in tako predstavlja vsaj za cas, potreben za pridobitev dovoljenja za prebivanje zaželena izbira.
    Ceprav ne redko tudi zelo mlade ženske porociti starci, poroke med moškim in žensko, ki je vec kot 2 leti starejši od njega, so zelo redka in prakticno zgodi le z ženskami iz zahodnih držav.
  • Odnosi z veliko ženskami
    Tudi ce tunizijske moški radi pravijo, da so všec, da denarja, ki so "naložbe" v svoje ženske, se prikažejo na njej, je velika razlika med "okrogel" in "debelih" - debelih žensk v Tuniziji, kot tudi v Evropa, cilj za slab in asteless šale in družbena sprejemljivost je precej nizka.
    Vendar, kot so ženske lahko "žrtev", saj imajo pogosto nizko samozavest in se dotaknil še posebej, ko se pretvarja, da privlacen moški kažejo zanimanje za njo.
  • Odnosi z ženskami locila
    Tako kot pri starejših ženskah, pozitivni primeri iz islamske vere so pogosto opozarjali, vendar v resnici, dejanski interes za sklenitev zakonske zveze razvezana ženska, ki je zelo nizka in obicajno le na voljo v kombinaciji s precej starec razvezanega mlada ženska.
    Poleg tega je lahko tak odnos obremenjen z otroci drugega cloveka, zaradi sprejemanja otrok drugega cloveka je, s Tunizije moški, zelo nizka, in sicer najmanj.
    To se kaže tudi v domaci porok, navadno za primer, da kadar ženska ponovno poroci, ona bo bolj ali manj opusti svoje otroke in jih pustiti, bodisi z ocetom ali kje drugje v družini ženska ali moški, kjer bodo potem zviša.
    Locen so ženske, kot tudi, v vecini primerov preprosto žrtve, ker bo pameten Beznesser hitro pridobiti dostop do custvenega mati samohranilka, ki želi na eni strani spet, da imajo popolno družino in na drugi strani pa hrepenela po cloveku .
Vse tri zgoraj omenjene skupine, se raje 'Bezness "ciljev, in clanom teh skupin bi morale voditi svoje oci particualrly" široko odprta ".
 
Družinski obiski

Mnoge evropske ženske napaka povabilo k družini tunizijskega cloveka in se tam uvaja kot "bodoco ženo" kot dejanje resnosti -, vendar ni.

V vecini primerov, ženske obiske družine se redno odvijajo, družina je seznanjena - in obstajajo celo primeri, v katerih bodo tunizijske žena predstavljena kot "sestra" ali "bratranec" iz cloveka povabi.

Ceprav je res, da clovek tunizijski uvaja svojo bodoco ženo v njegovi družini, v turizmu izkušenih družine, skoraj vsi Evropejci so "uvedel" v upanju, da pridobivanje "donacij" in darila - torej, uradno uvod v cloveka družine definitivno ni znak resnosti glede prihodnjega zakonske zveze!

V mnogih regijah Tunizije je navada, da bo prihodnja nevesta prejmejo darilo od famliy od moža, npr. srebro ali zlato zapestnico.

Nasprotno pa bo tunizijski ženska ne uvedejo njen prihodnji mož družino, toda clovek se bo namesto tega obisk na svojo družino in uvaja sebe in svojo željo porociti žensko.
Precautions

Precautions against Bezness are possible and even can offer a good protection - if only it starts early enough.
Since the below hints are certainly also read by interested parties from Tunisia, they can only serve as examples - the reader will get the idea, though, and can then plan for  a personal strategy.
  • Never talk about your payroll, your personal property or situation - if asked, only give vague answers!
    Ideally, you position yourself as a non-wealthy person living together with a roommate in a little apartment and the holiday is a result of many months of strict saving.
     >> In the relationship with a Tunisian woman, it is not so easy because, according to Tunisian law, the husband is obliged to provide for his wife, without any buts and ifs - if a woman then inquires about his assets, is does not have to be a sign of Bezness, but the woman only wants to make sure that he can offer a "secure existence". The man should, however, present himself as a "normal" worker with an income just sufficient to provide for a family
    Note: Even when she is married, the Tunisian woman normally retains her salary for herself, the man is always obligated to pay for his wifes proper living conditions.
  • Never leave behind valuable items at the end of the holiday "until the next time", which specifically relates to computers, cameras, telephones and personal papers.
    This will result in an unspoken obligation to return, something, that one later does not really want anymore - not to mention the risk that, even when one returns, one might never see the things again.
  • Point out good relationship to your family!
    It is absolutely normal in Tunisia, to counsel with the family and get advice from them.
    If you show, that your relationship to your own family is very close, it gives the signal that you are not am "easy" target and it might not be enough for a man to convince you, but also possibly your father, brother or uncle.
    >> In the relationship with a Tunisian woman, the man can always assume that the males of her family will ask for an interview and their recommendation for the woman will depend on this interview.
  • Under no circumstances, tell the potential husband that you could or would contribute to the costs of the wedding ceremony or the ticket cost for the flight to Europe!
    The woman should also express her ideas of a wedding gift from her husband.
    The financing of the wedding party in Tunisia is the up to the man - he or his family will even take out loans for a proper wedding; the ticket costs for flights to Europe and obtaining the visa should also be solely be imposed onto him.
    A Tunisian man who is serious with a woman, will never ask or even accept money from her, but save, even on a low wage, the money for the wedding.
    Golden jewelry Gifts (ring, bracelet, etc.) by the man to the woman at the wedding are absolutely normal and expected, since they express the value of the bride.
    >> In a relationship with a Tunisian woman, things are exactly the opposite - it is expected that the man pays for all expenses, because it is common custom - and, actually, he even has to provide the housing and the furniture.
    A European man has here therefore a definite disadvantage...
    
More Precautions
  • Learn the Tunisian language!
    ...and don't show it - in almost all cases, "Bezness" can be unveiled by simply listening to the conversations of the man with his friends, family members etc., not only , when they are unaware that you understand what they are talking about.
  • Always, in a closer relationship, demand to see the ID card (Carte Identité Nationale)!
    Every tunisian citizen must have the CIN on them at all times.
    This offers the possibility of obtaining and verifying the real name and birth date - because both are used very flexible in talks in Tunisia ( "Artist name", "Nickname").
    If then, at a later date, a problem should rise up, you will have at least the guarantee that you know the real name and dat of birth.
    Relationships to young persons: The age of adulthood in Tunisia is 20 years - relations to younger persons should generally be avoided!
    Info: Men below 35 may, and usually will, be drafted for a year of mandatory military service in Tunisia.
  • If you have the opportunity, talk to other Tunisians!
    Tunisians know their fellow countrymen quite well and in most cases, someone will feel honored to give you his opinion about a relationship.
    And even if one should not rely on such an opinion, it might give you hints and/or confirms suspiciouns and helps to become more aware and cautious.
    You should not talk with people, though, who are in close contact with the person in question. Rather consider to talk to Taxi drivers, apartment landlords, etc. - they see a lot and have lots of experience.
    This also applies to the ubiquitous policemen, which might, on an explicite demand, even suggest sometimes to be "careful" with an acquaintance!
  • Do not shy away from a "loyalty test"!
    In a "loyalty test", a friend, acquaintance, or professional agency will try to start up a relations ship with the target person by using SMS, instant messaging, telephone or even a "random" personal meeting.
    To put it quite clearly - such a test will succeed in more than 90 of 100 cases and show that the target person will, without big problems, engage in another relationship as well.
    The hope of "But mine is different" will then turn out, within a short time, to be just a dilusion, and this will be quite a disappointment - but it will save the person from an even bigger disappointment and significant emotional and financial loss later.
    And even when the assignment of an agency might cost 50 of 100 euros, this sum is, compared to a possible, even very likely, loss of thousands later, well invested.
    In certain cases, it will even make sense to seek the assistance of investigation agencies - again, it can save huge amounts of money and a lot of emotional distress!
Varnostni ukrepi

Previdnostni ukrepi proti Bezness so možne in celo lahko nudi dobro zašcito - samo ce se zacne dovolj zgodaj.
Od spodaj namigih so zagotovo tudi berejo z zainteresiranimi stranmi iz Tunizije, lahko služi samo kot primer - bralec bo dobil idejo, ceprav, in lahko nato nacrtuje za osebno strategijo.
  • Nikoli ne govori o svoji placilni listi, vaše osebno premoženje ali položaj - ce se vprašal, le daje nejasne odgovore!
    V idealnem primeru se položaj sebe, kot da ni bogati osebo, ki živi skupaj s sostanovalko v majhno stanovanje in pocitnice so rezultat vecmesecnih strogega varcevanja.
    >> V odnosu z žensko Tunizije, to ni tako enostavno, ker, po tunizijski zakonodaji, je mož dolžan poskrbeti za svojo ženo, brez izgovorjavo in oklijevanja - ce se ženska potem vpraša o svojem premoženju, se ne morajo biti znak Bezness, ampak ženska samo želi zagotoviti, da lahko ponudi "varno obstoj". Clovek bi morala, pa predstavi sebe kot "normalnega" delavca z dohodki ravno še zadošcajo za zagotovitev družino
    Opomba: Tudi ce je ona porocena, tunizijski ženska ponavadi ohrani svojo placo zase, clovek je vedno dolžan placati za svoje wifes ustreznih življenjskih pogojev.
  • Nikoli ne zapustiti vrednih predmetov na koncu pocitnic "do naslednjic", ki se posebej nanaša na racunalnike, kamere, telefoni in osebne dokumente.
    To bo povzrocilo Neizrecen obveznost vracanja, nekaj, da ena kasneje v resnici ne želi vec - da ne omenjam, da je tveganje, tudi ce ena vrne, nikoli ne bi videli stvari znova.
  • Poudarite dobre povezave z vašo družino!
    To je povsem normalno v Tuniziji, do zagovornika z družino in dobili nasvet od njih.
    Ce kažejo, da je vaš odnos do lastne družine je zelo blizu, daje signal, da niste am "easy", cilj in ga morda ne bo dovolj za cloveka, da vas prepricani, verjetno pa tudi tvoj oce, brat in stric .
    >> V odnosu z žensko Tunizije, se lahko clovek vedno predpostavimo, da bodo samci družine zaprosi za razgovor in njihova priporocila za ženske bo odvisna od tega intervjuja.
  • Pod nobenim pogojem, povej potencialne mož, ki bi lahko ali pa bi prispevala k stroškom porocni obred ali strošek vozovnico za let v Evropo!
    Ženska mora tudi izraziti svoje ideje za porocno darilo od svojega moža.
    Financiranje svate v Tuniziji, je do cloveka - on ali njegove družine bo celo vzeti posojila za pravilno poroko, vozovnic za lete v Evropo in pridobitev vizuma je treba tudi treba uvesti le na njega.
    Tunisian clovek, ki je resna z žensko, nikoli ne bomo spraševali, ali celo sprejemajo denar od nje, vendar razen, tudi na nizke place, denar za poroko.
    Golden nakit Darila (prstan, zapestnico, itd), ki ga clovek, ki je ženska na poroki, so popolnoma normalno in pricakovano, saj izražajo vrednost neveste.
    >> V odnosu z žensko Tunizije, stvari so ravno nasprotno - je pricakovati, da clovek placuje za vse stroške, saj je skupna meri - in, pravzaprav, je celo mora zagotoviti stanovanja in pohištva.
    Evropska clovek je tu zato dolocen položaj ...
    
Vec Varnostni ukrepi
  • Vec o tem, tunizijski jezik!
    ... in ne kažejo, da - v skoraj vseh primerih, "Bezness" lahko predstavila s preprosto poslušanje pogovori clovek s svojim prijateljem, družinskim clanom itd, ne le, ko se ne zavedajo, da ste razumeli, kaj oni so zvocni film približno.
  • Vedno, v tesnejši odnos, povpraševanje za prikaz kartico ID (Carte Identité Nationale)!
    Vsak tunizijski državljan mora imeti CIN na njih ves cas.
    Ta ponuja možnost za pridobitev in preverjanje pravo ime in datum rojstva - ker sta oba uporabljena zelo prožna v pogovorih v Tuniziji ( "Artist name", "Nadimek").
    Ce se potem, na poznejši datum, je treba problem dvignil, boš imel vsaj zagotavlja, da poznate pravo ime in dat rojstva.
    Razmerja za mlade osebe: starost odraslosti v Tuniziji, je 20 let - odnosi z mlajšimi osebami na splošno je treba izogibati!
    Info: Moški pod 35 lahko, in ponavadi, je zasnovan za leto obveznega služenja vojaškega roka v Tuniziji.
  • Ce imate možnost, se posvetujte z drugim Tunizijcev!
    Tunizijcev poznajo svoje rojake precej dobro in v vecini primerov, se bodo pocutili nekdo pocašcen, da vam svoje mnenje o razmerju.
    In tudi ce se ne bi smela zanašati na to mnenje, morda vam namigi in / ali potrdi suspiciouns in pomaga, da bolje spoznajo in previdne.
    Ne smete govoriti z ljudmi, ceprav, ki so v tesnem stiku z osebo, na vprašanje. Nasprotno meni, da se pogovorite s taxi voznikom, stanovanje najemodajalci, itd - vidijo veliko in imajo veliko izkušenj.
    To velja tudi za vseobsegajoci policistov, ki bi lahko na zahtevo explicite, vcasih celo kažejo, da so "previdni" z znanca!
  • Ne izogibati "test lojalnosti"!
    V "test lojalnosti", bo prijatelja, znanca, ali poklicna agencija poskusite za zagon odnosov z ladjo ciljno osebo, z uporabo SMS, takojšnje sporocanje, telefonu ali celo "nakljucno" osebna srecanja.
    Da bi to cisto jasno - tako test bo uspelo v vec kot 90 100 primerov in kažejo, da bo cilj oseba, brez velikih težav, sodelujejo v drugem razmerju, kot tudi.
    Upanje, "Ampak moj je drugacen", potem se bo izkazalo, v kratkem casu, da se samo dilusion, in to bo cisto razocaranje - vendar bo rešila oseba še vecje razocaranje in pomembne custveno in financno izgubo pozneje.
    In tudi ce bi dodelitev agencije stroškov 50 od 100 evrov, ta znesek je v primerjavi z možno, celo zelo verjetno, izgubo vec tisoc pozneje, tudi vlagala.
    V nekaterih primerih celo smiselno poiskati pomoc preiskovalnih agencij - spet, lahko shranite ogromne kolicine denarja in veliko custvene stiske! 
Fooled?

First a warning - if a woman was trapped by a Bezness man, and finds it out and then wants to terminate the relationship, she should be cautious.

In the years 2008 and 2009, there have been several incidents in which women in such a "last debate" were raped, physically injured and in one case even killed.
To such a debate, a woman should therefore never go alone (take a friend, ideally, a male, with you) and, in particular, never stay alone with the ex-lover in a remote or non-public place (eg. an apartment).

Even if a dangerous situation is not always and automatically imminent, one should be very cautious and prevent any situations that could escalate!
    
Police

In the case of threats, but also fraud or theft, immediately inform the police. They are used to this kind of crimes and will usually show no mercy. And even if the person should mange to get away this time, he won't, if it happens again - and so, informing the local police not only can protect oneself, but also possible victims in the future!

Even when you have the impression that, in a conversation with the police, they do not believe you or try to blame you - the police in the tourist areas know such situations from daily experience and will pursue their task to help and protect tourists using their best efforts. There is absolutely no reason for shame or restrain!
    
Internet Forums

And you should also consider one more step to - namely, to go public and go to one of the relevant internet forums where you can report this (negative) experience, either in anonymous form (without names) or by putting an entry into a "black list of Bezness men of Tunisia".

In forums, you will often hear the assertion that such reports are made by women who only want to "hurt" a man by telling lies about him.

This assertion, however, is usually wrong, according to all actual experiences, because on one hand, false accusations in discussions forums will, in almost all cases, be reveiled quite fast (or true accusations confirmed) by other forum members, and secondly, one is well aware that a "mistake" in one particular case does not automatically constitute a wrong doing in another case - but it is certainly a strong hint to a potential successor to be very cautious with this person!

On the WorldWideWeb, there are several discussion forums in different languages, all of which deal as well with love relationships with Tunisians.

Here is a selection of the most famous forums dealing with this topic
Sledil?

Najprej opozorilo - ce je bil ujet ženska, ki ga Bezness clovek, in ugotovi, da je, in potem hoce prekiniti odnos, je treba biti previden.

V letih 2008 in 2009 je prišlo do vec incidentov, v katerih "so bile ženske v takih" zadnji razpravi posiljena, telesno poškodovanih in v enem primeru pa celo ubili.
Za take razprave, ženska je zato nikoli ne gre sam (sprejme prijatelja, idealno, moški, s tabo), in predvsem, nikoli ne ostanejo sami z ex-lover v oddaljenih ali ne-javnem mestu (npr. stanovanje).

Tudi ce nevaren položaj ni vedno in samodejno neizbežna, mora biti eden biti zelo previden in prepreciti razmere, ki se lahko stopnjujejo!
   

Policija

V primeru ogroženosti, ampak tudi goljufije in tatvine, takoj obvestiti policijo. Uporabljajo se za to vrsto kaznivih dejanj in obicajno ne kažejo nobenega usmiljenja. In tudi ce bi oseba, mange pobegniti tem casu je ne bo, ce se to zgodi še enkrat - in tako, obvešcanje lokalne policije, ne samo, da lahko zašciti samega sebe, temvec tudi morebitne žrtve v prihodnosti!

Tudi ce imate obcutek, da je v pogovoru s policijo, ne verjamem ti, ali poskusite krivim tebe - policija v turisticnih obmocjih vedo takšnih situacijah iz vsakodnevnih izkušenj, in bo še naprej njihova naloga pomagati in zašcititi turistom uporabo njihovih najboljših moceh. Ni nobenega razloga za sram ali omejujejo!
   

Internet Forumi

In morate razmisliti tudi en korak k - namrec, da gredo javnosti in iti na eno od pomembnih forumih internetu, kjer si lahko o tej (negativne) izkušnje, bodisi v anonimni obliki (brez imena), ali z uvedbo zacetek " crni seznam Bezness ljudje Tunizija ".

V forumih, boste pogosto slišali trditev, da so taka porocila, ki jih ženske, ki samo želijo "poškodovati" clovek, ki ga govori laži o njem.

Ta trditev pa je navadno narobe, glede na vse dejanske izkušnje, saj je na eni strani, lažnih obtožb v razpravah forumih, bo, v skoraj vseh primerih, se reveiled precej hitro (ali res obtožb potrjeno), z ostalimi clani foruma, in drugic, ena se dobro zaveda, da je "napaka" v enem konkretnem primeru ne pomeni avtomaticno napacno pocetje, v drugem primeru - je pa zagotovo mocan namig, da potencial naslednik zelo previden s to osebo!

Na WorldWideWeb, obstaja vec forumi v razlicnih jezikih, kar vse se ukvarjajo tudi z ljubeznijo odnose z Tunizijcev.

Tukaj je izbor najbolj znanih forumih, ki se ukvarjajo s to temo

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